Monday, June 28, 2010

So, umm, sorry! This is for a date!

I have determined that people will do just about anything for you if you let them know they're helping your date. It's simple enough: all the two of you have to do is look a little embarrassed and say, "So, umm, sorry! This is for a date...," then you continue on to make your unusual, absurd, and creepy demands. Whatever you ask of them now seems doable. Acceptable. Automatically attached to any request is an element of fun and adventure.

Times this phrase would come in handy:

1. When you need food!

             "So, umm, sorry... We're on a date, and we need two bowls of ice cream. 
Could you by chance spare some?"

(Why sure! You two dears look so cute together. Is this like a scavenger hunt?)

2. When you break something!

              "...So, umm, sorry... We're on a date, and we just broke 
one of your lawn chairs."

(Oh, nobody ever sat on that old thing anyways! 
Your adorable date wasn't hurt was she?)

3. To invade boundaries.

"...So, umm, sorry. We're on a date, and we saw a trampoline in your back yard...

(Hey! Grandpa would like to join you if that's okay.)

4.  To get away with something

So, umm, sorry Officers. We're on a date, but we'll take off if you want us to!

(Oh you little raggamuffins! What fun you must be having. Ah, the joy of youth!

One of my own stories: A few years ago, my date and I decided we really wanted ice cream, but, bless her dear little heart... she felt bad that I'd have to spend money. So I had an idea, and it would work perfectly since we were right in the middle of an apartment complex! We went to the first door, knocked, and I said, "So, umm... we're on this date... do you happen to have an egg?" The person looked a little confused at first, but immediately perked up, and with a "just one moment!" went and got us an egg! "There you are..." Next door: Knock Knock. "So, umm... we're on this date... would you be willing to buy this egg from us for 25 cents?" ..."Oh... umm... yeah! Sure." Ca-CHING! So easy! ...We went door-to-door for about 10 minutes asking for eggs and selling them, and pretty soon we had about five bucks for ice cream! Next stop: The Malt Shoppe! Yeahya!

I'm actually thinking of basing an entire date based around this idea. Beforehand, the other guys and I would get together and come up with a list of challenges (which, knowing my friends, might be pretty embarrassing). Then we'd give our dates a chance to help out with (or reject) ideas. Man... I'm kind of getting excited about this. If I ever do it, I'll be sure to report to you.

...PS: One note. I have a strict honesty policy! If you're ever going to use this little technique, you dang well better be on a date! 


  1. hahaha love the random absurd dodo bird, thank you for that

    spacing is perfect silly! i assume you fixed it


  2. HAHA! This made me laugh really hard! It is so true. . .

    Now I will know what you are up to if you knock on my door with a date!

  3. that little girl looks like she has anti-social personality.....

    Oh, and that is a great date idea. what if someone throws hot chocolate in your faces? just sayin....

    ;) do you think it would work if you asked them to borrow their 1984 convertible corvette to take it for a spin around the block???

  4. It's been forever since I "dated". I wonder if these work on dates with my wife?

  5. BTW, I immediately liked you as soon as I saw you had a blog called "Nilbog". Troll II fans unite!

  6. This was CRACKING me up! Ha! I just found your blog and I'm so glad I did. I was reeled in immediately to your blog when I saw a the picture of "Big! Lots" at the top. My friend and I once had a heated debate (not too hot) about whether the store name meant it was "big" and had "lots" of stuff or if it was big lots/pallets of stuff. We went so far as to contact the company's headquarters! We were just being stupid, of course. Anyway, fun blog. Love it!

  7. If you're such a rebel and loner, how do you go on so many dates!?!

    Loved the post. I'd try it, but I haven't been on a date in forever. Back before cell phones, I did get my lunch in college by asking for quarters to call home. Burrito was calling me!!

  8. Hey, where did you get that picture of Sarah pouting haha!


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